I'm so bummed I missed coconut bowling. It's fucking cold here and no coconuts to be found
Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
I wonder if there will ever be a day where I don't find lisps really really hilarious.
she made me cover her fishbowl with my shirt because she "didn't want to corrupt it."
jess passed out on the pong table. it was depressing until we started singing shania twain an hour later and heard her muffled voice singing along.
i just sold a bong and some oregano to fifth graders for sixty dollars. doing something tonight?
But like now everytime I pee I just think... wow I had sex with him on this toilet.
She used the introduce me to her roommates so she could find out my name trick the next morning..I may be in love.
I ended up with a gash in my head from drunken dancing last night. I love life.
You're not on my level until you shop at Petsmart for sex accessories.
They turned motor-boating me into some kind of sick game
only thing in my fruit bowl is 4 champagne corks and a jenga piece . Tuesday.
2 reasons we need to wear those onesies to the bar more ofter 1) comfy as shit 2) we both still got laid\n\nHow can you resist that kinda night?
And you will die and be carried in a backpack before I allow you not to comply in this tomfoolery.
if by making eggnog you mean drinking all the spiced rum, then yes, she's making eggnog
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