I just found out how hard it is to put together a fake Christmas tree with a hangover.
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
His dick looked like E.T.'s finger. It scared me.
grown man stumbling drunk down green street wearing nothing but a hot dog costume and crying. its not even noon yet.
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
Did you bedazzle the elevator?
Dont eat ANYTHING off the floor at Matt's house. He likes floor sex.
When a girl says " I never would have come over if I knew I was getting kicked out at 7am." the correct response isn't "but think of how responsible you're being."
I whispered "you're doing a great Job" when he was fucking me. Then high fived him.
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
I threw up all of my purple drank and thats really important
If I could tell my younger self three things it would be: 1. Smoke a lot more weed 2. Have a lot more sex 3. Own a good set of pots and pans
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
Randomize
