Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
I just saw my grandmother naked. again. this needs to stop now.
i just learned how to squirt via google. life is good.
Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just heard this lady walk by on her phone saying "did everyone orgasm?"
While you were puking in the ocean I was rubbing your back saying "Just give it back to Mother Earth".
i don't know at this point bringing the fog horn might be a good idea...
when i first looked at you, you weren't wearing any pants. but then i realized you had them around your neck as a cape.
He just invited me over to bang on a sunday afternoon. If I can make it top the time I went to a strip club on fathers day then I'll consider it a success.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He put on a roller derby documentary. It was either bore myself to death watching that or take off my dress. He was very appreciative.
you know, i'm always afraid you're going to think i only want you for sex because i only text you when i'm horny
speaking of, guess what i'm thinking about
All I've been thinking about for the past 12 hours is sex and SEAWORLD
Me and some girl at the bar just high fived for not wearing bras
How does one tell their boyfriend they're pregnant with someone else's kid??
He paid for a 5 star hotel suite and I raided the mini bar after he left. I think that’s bad karma. Want some pringles?
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