I puked off the balcony.
Not horrible
Into the hottub. There were six people in it. I had eaten all their pizza.
She's holding my hand. I'm going to kill myself.
I lost control in the snow and hit a parked car. I went into our building to get a pen and paper to leave a note and when I came back the car was gone and there was a hot girl there. I used the pen and paper to get her number.
I'm so used to throwing up its no longer a game of hanging over the toilet. Now it's just 'stand up, aim for the toilet, do my thing' then walk out
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according to the random from alabama i slept with last night i kept saying "poor lil tink tink" over and over in my sleep
Is there a word for someone who only has sex with NFL prospects?
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
Were at her birthday dinner and her dad keeps buying me shots saying when I was your age I fucked the shit outta girls
Hahahahahaha remind him your dating his daughter
Passed out drunk in a tanning bed...
Did At The Beach call the fire department to get you like last time?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Seeing your one night stand on campus never gets less awkward. Why is Subway the only good place to eat?
New York City is dangerous when the only bars you go to are the ones that have 'open' in front
He ended up buying the equivalent of dinner at a Mexican place, in weed
I may have had several rum punches and then gone to the store and used European cucumbers to prove my baton twirling prowess.
Good, I don't think Coke dipped ring pops hold up in the mail anyway.
I didn't want dick. I wanted spaghetti.
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