I told her I had to go to work this morning, got fully dressed in a suit, walked her out, drove around the block, parked, and walked right back in my apt and went back to sleep..
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
I just wished the taco bell drive thru guy a happy cinco de mayo. Who says arizonians hate mexicans?
I was just walking down the hall and passed a very pregnant girl wearing a shirt that said "blame it on the aaaaaa-alcohol." I can't decide if she's brilliantly witty or just pointing fingers.
Do you know many girls there are in gay bars waiting for me to do coke off their tits? A lot.
It's not prostitution until you're out of college. Right now it's just strategic boning.
then they caught me trying to hide the turtle in the fridge
She just said, "are my livers going to die?"
there's a guy pushing a keg up the street in a shopping cart. you have to love graduation
I would lick a homeless mans crack teeth for a cup of coffee right now.
we have what I like to call an assload of ramen noodles
I feel like your personal Bdsm barbie...
If you send me one more .gif of that fumble, I will make the 10 hour drive just to set you on fire.
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
All of a sudden he got that look on his face and ran to the dance floor and started fist pumping to Rihanna that kind of night
Randomize
