handjob tips. give me some.
and i looked up. we had an audience...
Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
I looked at you and you stared at me dead in the eyes then sprayed febreze at your crotch and winked.
Remember that time we were in the handicap bathroom snorting Molly at the stripclub. That was a defining moment in our friendship
I just spent 30 minutes cleaning out my coleman grill. Did you really have to have grilled yogurt?
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
We play this game where we catch up on what we missed over five years of not talking to eachother, then we have sex like nothing ever happened.
im not trying to sound dramatic, but im covered in microwavable lasagna
I decided it might be a good time to stop when he requested I "bring that pussy over here"
The party was Hollywood themed and I won an oscar for "finest ass in a leading role"
The moment buddy the elf found out he was human is exactly like the moment I realized I was gay
IM ON THE WEIRD DRUGS AND I JUST SAW THAT TOM HARDY THING NOW I WANT TO HUMP
just turned another straight guy gay. Goddamn the church must hate me
He thought reverse cowgirl meant he dressed up as a cowgirl. Honestly, it was more creepy than funny
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