youve choked your chicken with your arm asleep and acted like it was some1 else right?
ever seen your mom drunk enough to lick your face? i have
I googled what to do, and it said to squeeze the pressure out so people are taking turns sitting on my head. I can't believe I'm allowing this
I kind of learned that hotels are unnecessary. Boys will just take you home, but that's tough with a group. I believe in us, though.
All i want to do is drink fuck and cry... you dont have to cater all three its more like the saddest choose your own adventure ever
All I know is she walked in crying with a bag of limes and a bottle of tequila and has been locked in her room blasting lil wayne ever since.
I'm glad the semester is over. I need a break from the term "whiskey sharts" coming up so much in conversation.
Hey, I took a sweater from your house. And, um, your little brother's virginity.
It's not that I even wanna fuck these guys anymore, just cuddle that's all. My conscience has never been so proud.
It has gotten to a point where I just want to sit on his face. Less butterflies, more orgasms.
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
I'm two shots in and wandering around Barnes and Noble with $58 in singles.
He's slurring his text. I didn't think that was possible.
I never realized how you can accidentally go home with someone until tequila got involved.
I won the 'drunkest person at a family event' award tonight.
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