My ass is singing 4 different tunes right about now... Taco Bell was a bad idea!
so i woke up to her 8 year old asking for a bowl of cereal...
Half Baked? Au contraire, Ben and Jerry, I was fully baked when I ate that whole pint of ice cream.
The walk of shame is far, far worse on crutches.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He shit in the bushes next to the pool at the Venetian, after throwing up in the hallway. You really can do anything in Vegas.
Just wana tell you im wearing assless jorts tonight. Ive been waiting my whole life for this.
I was talking to a guy at my work, and mid-sentence he started vomiting violently for about five minutes, then he said, " great dope" and carried on like nothing had happened.
In 30 minutes I will have been sober for an entire month. Time for a celebratory lap of cheap alcohol that leads to early liver failure.
But happy liver failure. That's what counts.
Just saw a huge group of people walk by in there in their underwear. Too stoned for this.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I will pee on everything he values.
her mom went out of her way to book us a room with separate beds... her level of gay denial is in beast mode
I'd cum for enchiladas.
Hey, I'm 22. I'm allowed to have a sex life and you're going to hear about it.
So many questions so I’ll prioritize. How did I survive last night?
you're not celebrating your 21st birthday right unless you give a male stripper a hand job, flash the bartender, and win a free vibrator.
Randomize