just heard the best thing ever: calling people's kids "fuck trophies"
remember that night jesus turned water into wine? DRUNKER.
He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
Yea well when i pee it makes steam.
it's already thursday and i haven't gotten drunk yet...something's not right.
Sandwiches are there for you when porn isn't.
He was eating her out on the elevator. What a good man.
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
Did I actually say goodbye last night or did I just poison you with vodka and disappear?
Whatever. That's why I am to be babied like a calf. I regret nothing.
My girl came home. i was jacking off on the couch and she just starts telling me about her day, as if im not half naked with my hand on my cock.
4 days in college, 3 frat parties. I haven't been this drunk since the unspeakable Jäger bomb incident in Sweden.
I'm full of champagne and rage, of course I'm showing up at his house.
I'm not sure what exactly you were planning, but you kept yelling that we were going to need a lot of midgets and a lawyer.
Randomize