I feel miserable, can't drink that much when I go out
We've been saying that since '98
Pants 0. Shit 1.
he wrote Vegans should suck on cow dick on her wall with permanent marker. thats how he got the black eye
I think I could pass a breathalyzer. But with like a C.
So we went to home depot to buy supplies to build a beer bong but ended up buying an office water cooler that were going to put vodka in
Sophomore year, I fucked on your desk chair. I'm sorry. I love you.
HOW DID YOU END UP IN THE BATHROOM WITH A DANCER AFTER 12 MINUTES?
Is girls night deemed a success when you piss the bed?
I got dressed on his front steps, peed on his neighbors lawn, then did a shoeless walk of shame home at 5am...
Friend as in 'I used to have sex with her' or friend as in 'I still want to have sex with her'?
we talked about the guy being eaten by the anaconda.. Then I proceeded to blow him
Eating breakfast at 1:30 in the afternoon stark naked is how everyone should live
Help I can't tell if I'm sexually attracted to Bill Nye
Oh.
You came to the right person.
He's got a british accent, a tounge ring, and he's wearing an eye patch... Of corse I'm fucking him
but next to his bed he has a bible, and on the bible he has a pbr coaster and a condom. how can i stay mad at that? Its amazing.
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