yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
Bar. Show boob. Just one. Free drinks. Instant friends
Guys only need one. Little known secret. You're welcome.
There is now a Twilight themed dildo. What do YOU want for christmas??
Best news ive heard all week. The cougars r coming! The cougars are coming!
no, i'm not a lesbian.. i just really want to fuck you while drinking, thats normal in a friendship.
at one point he was caressing me in the kitchen asking me my name over and over again and then asking what my favorite continent was
yeah people on the adjacent balcony, Im naked drinking outside in 0 degree weather at 1pm. got a problem?
Alright whatever you say... But in the future when you really wish you had a dildo don't come crying to me about it.
Well, I convinced myself I had a sixth toe and then I ripped it off. So I PRAY you're doing better than me.
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
apparently i tried to facetime the drunk bus last night, that's probably why we had to walk back to campus
Drunk ass.
My arrest report says I was found in midtown "performing lewd and lascivious acts on top of art meant for public display and enjoyment".
You don't know true terror until you get stuck in a porta potty while frying your face off.
alcohol and riverdancing are a dangerous mix. have a spraind ankle. i die now
It's five in the morning. wtf?
He has no idea I'm scrolling through Instagram while he's going down on me. I'm so bored.
Randomize
