Your friends ate a hole through an entire loaf of bread
That's why she's the girl with her life together and you're the girl with the penis drawn on your car.
I used the picture of my mom and I doing blow job shots in Vegas in the presentation for my Spanish final. Graduation here I come.
It took him an hour to realize I wasn't this "Sarah" girl, and by then he was already crying and eating pizza rolls.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's holes in the drywall and the beer pong table is a broken door on two barstools. You know they like to party.
Dude. That Grinch had his priorities right when he was worried that there might be a cash bar at that town celebration.
Your ability to whip out your dick and take a pic anytime I text you is startling.
They wouldn't let me on the bull because I couldn't even sign my own name... She let me try 3 times...
I'm taking a pole dancing class this morning. Can I put you down as my emergency contact? I'm NOT putting my mother
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
2015 is the year I FINALLY ALMOST had enough dick to satisfy me.
He was watching porn and riding a stationary bike in the living room
The convent might be a nice break from real life
chipped my right front tooth on a toilette. i figure if i keep drinking i won't care for at least 2 days
I'm on a walk of shame carrying YOUR pants. You owe me.
Also, in case they didn’t tell you… there is a chicken living in your old room… so I would assume cleaning that is now on them
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