Turns out "bordello" doesn't mean what I thought it did.
She was puking in a plastic bag while cleaning where she puked on the floor. She knows how to multitask.
Remember how I haven't seen my step sister in like 7 years? Pretty sure I just made out with her...
I mean it's not my fault he had a floor mat that read "put out or get out". What was I supposed to do?
Who wants vodka and apple sauce
I would seriously fuck her so hard, her contacts would pop out of her eyes.
I AM COVERED IN FAKE BLOOD AND REAL CUM. I AM AWESOME
They should incorporate dolphins into professional surfing
That moment when your fucking in an airport bathroom and forget to lock the door. That poor man...scarred forever...
Or I could hide in your trunk so you can sneak out of putt putt for sex breaks
How do you keep manipulating these men into helping you?
I'm a massage therapist with an oral fixation. It's not nearly as hard as you make it out to be.
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
That's crazy. Wow that lady must be fucked up
Yeah I hope she's okay.
I'm still going to fuck her husband but I do hope she's okay.
I woke up in the bathroom clutching a stuffed shark. My night was fantastic, thanks for asking.
He went down on me while I was on the phone with my grandma.
Randomize
