All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
There's a girl in here wearing a kaballah bracelet and a miley Cyrus tshirt. consider her judged.
Puked on a Tom Jones impersonator on the strip
THEY ARE MY AGE. THEY ARE YOUR LITTLE SISTER'S AGE THIS IS A DELICATE MATTER. CAPS LOCK
i miss our vodka / percocet laundry days.
we tried to steal a tractor last night. you should have come out.
I feel like everytime I call him he's either fucking or getting into trouble. It's really disturbing that he presses the answer button and then proceeds to fuck her harder.
he stopped during sex, told me i smelled like McDonald's and went harder..
Yay for living on the edge. I'm trying this new thing where I stop mom-arming people and promote bad decisions. It's working quite well.
Hey do you know who I showed my dick to at the bar last night?
I JUST MADE OUT WITH A BRITISH SOCCER PLAYER. LONG LIVE THE QUEEN. GOD BLESS THAT COUNTRY.
Most desperate stoner moment; dropped our hard earned resin ball in the sand, rinsed it off and then did knife hits in the kitchen cuz we broke our only pipe
my grandpa paid for my boob job but he just doesn't know it.
My roomate had an hour long melt down about her life choices not realizing I was in the middle of having sex... So yea it went pretty horribly.
WE HAVE TO LEAVE. I HAVE HAD SEX WITH WAY TOO MANY PEOPLE IN THIS BUS STATION.
Randomize
