Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
My moms helping me unpack but im getting a little nervous because I dont remember where i put my dildo
to do: lose virginity to hamster dance
handjob tips. give me some.
just realized I'm too high to take the plastic off a slice of cheese....
You paid the taxi driver with a comb last night.
I call it my summer of slut; except summer lasts from May until December. It's been incredibly successful
I can already almost taste penis in my mouth
that beer fried lasagna last night was sooo good
that wasnt beer fried lasagna, you just poured beer on my lasagna
I NEED YOU HERE TO KNOCK THE MALT BEVERAGES OUT OF MY MOUTH
And now we should drink to that moment where you realize you didn't exactly think things through.
Def just threw up beer then brushed my teeth with some randos toothpaste now back to drinkin beer
And I'm glad you're waiting to invite him over. he may have a weird penis thing and then dinner becomes awkward.
Long story short I shit on a sidewalk while walking with multiple people. Then sprinted around the streets of Tallahassee in only gym shorts as I tore my toga off and wore it as a cape.
I woke up with your bra on, and some guys boxers. I'm in a random truck, in the middle of nowhere...
Randomize
