i threw up on the table at the pizza place and peed in her room mates closet. i wouldnt invite me back either
Need help. Super baked. Stuck on couch. Dying of thirst. Bring paint thinner or something to pry me off. Only thumbs and neck work.
Jello bowls to the fucking face, that or ramen spiked with liq. Those are the only options in this house.
it would be cheaper just to buy a dildo to intimidate people with.
I feel like this is going to result in some sort of tearing in my vagina.
Thats a chance were just gonna have to take
I'm wearing red that night.
Noted, what shade?
Whore.
If taco bell and midol can't fix her, she's in gods hands now.
I just threw in a dip with a guy that superglued his fake tooth back in today. My life is complete.
Eight drinks in. Subject is fondling chips before eating them. Intoxicated texting has expanded from best friend to random guy I met in FBLA.
I was just at home taking Vicodin for a week straight. Talk about a vacation.
I gave you the craziest sex experiences of your life, the least you could do is let me keep the sweater.
Just told some little girl not to judge me as I brushed my teeth in the target bathroom
You kept yelling stranger danger at Nick because he was talking to that girl you didn't like. Your not invited ever again.
Broken heels while double fisting margaritas, picking up shirtless, bloody men and escorting them out of harms way, the meltdown when I realized I can go without a bra bc my boobs shrunk, the morning vodka red bull you were forced to drink? Which one roped you in?
i haven't seen you in two years and we have like 16 hours, all i want is cuddles, wine, and some light groping
Randomize
