apparently you CAN get banned from Nascar.
I now officially know the distance between my two boobs is one twizzler.
New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
Dude apparently i ran into the middle of a half marathon last night and some how won
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Jason and steven are boiling shrimp in the microwave again
Oh shit. There are penis maracas
Joe decreed the livingroom and the hallway up to the burn mark his kingdom. I think this is the point of 'stage an intervention'
You're always so generous when it comes to your dick.
Yea. Some girl set a laundry machine on fire. She's not getting married.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
Ted is on HBO in 20 minutes...not sure if this or the drunken dance party I had at the bar to a N*SYNC Christmas song 20 minutes ago is the highlight of my week so far.
Things that happen while I poop: I start dating someone
There is a huge fucking spider in my bathroom....I can just burn our apartment down right? What do you need me to grab?
I almost rear ended this hot guy driving a Porsche Cayenne just so I could get his phone number
Well that didn’t go as expected.
I mean, it ended in you giving each of them a blowjob, so it kinda did.
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