Call me "white mamba"
Your dick is not a dangerous deadly poisonous snake
It is white.
please stop taking shits in my toilet and leaving them there.
spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
I just almost got out my car and drop kicked this one chick over parking. Welcome to the first day of spring semester.
I found it funny that her boobs actually kinda felt like a bag of sand. the 40 year old virgin should feel better about himself.
Just pulled an upper-decker at a hardware store. I believe I'm winning 8-2. It's obvious you don't shit enough in public.
What a whore. She reminds me of that asian guy who can eat all the hotdogs.
he turned two sober chicks into 7 drunken girls...he's my hero
Having a dry hump session to Alvin and the chipmunks surprisingly didn't kill the mood. He's that good.
Why i have shady connections. Owner just txt me asking to come by and judge the new stripper.
You shouted "FUCK SHANIA TWAIN" and then downed an Aquafina bottle of white wine none of us knew how to react
No talking tonight. Just drinking and puking up memories
I was thirsty after the sex and it was a long trek back to res so naturally I stole chocolate milk from his fridge as I left
I may have been mad at the Supreme Court/patriarchy and tried to hate fuck myself.