Ricky Martin is gay. You owe me $10 from 3rd grade.
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
Did you spray paint that captain morgan fifth that's in the freezer gold?
You won’t make it to November. A 21st bday and Halloween in the same night has shitshow/ jail written all over it. So I call dibs on that tall guy
She's barefoot and topless screaming "HERE KITTY-KITTY" at a stray cat in the ditch on the side of the highway. How do I get her back in the car?
Yeah we do. It needs to be like a good penis- long, substancial, and able to make people cry.
You're an idiot. I have LIVED as a cautionary tale of what happens when you drink too much and stick your dick in crazy, HAVE YOU LEARNED NOTHING?
I'm cutting her off I can't have my good name soiled with these kinds of shenanigans
Shit is preposterous
Go christen that room with your naked body.
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
You spent like 10 minutes trying to hit a golf ball that was actually a cigarette butt. And then fell over.
I wanna eat mushrooms and cuddle with a million dogs at once. I wanna know what heaven is like
i was so proud for not passing out at the same time as usual. i screamed that i had a "new personal best!" then some jackass explained daylight savings.
Did you clean my apartment?
I thought it was a dream, I'm sorry
Please stay more often
Randomize
