so howd the 'mom i only play with condoms' conversation go?
Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
I have to collect my sorority sisters from greek row... I hate how being dd is a night and morning job
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
this is really not the time to pretend we have morals
Chasing tequila with honey. Ill let you know how it turns out.
They don't allow McDonald's in the ER. Go figure
I ate goldfish off your shoulder, I think we had bigger issues
This is like the best thing that's ever happened to us. We're getting paid to sit around get high and eat. There is a Jesus
You tried to bite my nipple like 3 times
NAh son
Just general bites
Also, my aunt grabbed my phone and downloaded the scriptures. Apparently I need Jesus.
I was drunk, he was taking a bodyshot while avoiding my piercing. I told him I loved him. He waited until I woke up with my hangover to say he loved me too. It was hangover magic.
Riddle me this: I can stream porn just fine but try and watch my college class and nooo it won't work
Be there in 4 minutes
I am not walking across campus just to give you a blow job in the hopes that in return i can study more efficiently.
As soon as he called me 'darling' in that Scottish accent... my pants just dropped.
Randomize