I should be sponsored by Trojan
I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
Just had to explain to a senior manager why I had duct tape residue on my wrist and hand. This weekend was a success.
Hahaha you puked all over his shirt.
You puked in the planter and everyone saw your snatch.
Well someones bitter they didn't get any.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was the most graceful puke ever. I just thought she dropped something underneath the bar until she told me what happened.
He ate me out. IN THE MORNING. I love less attractive men.
Is it too much to ask that I wake up one morning with out a pic of your dick as my wallpaper??
I'm not drinking with you for AT LEAST a day
I woke up with $140 in twenties in my bra and have never been more puzzled.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He said that he had extra crunchy taquitos and wanted to go down on me.. I mean how could I say no?
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
Lynn just told me "I heard about your divorce. Condoms or morning pill your choice and I'm buying". Sorry but I got plans now bro.
What happened last night dude?
YOU SHIT ON MY FUCKING COFFE TABLE THATS WHAT FUCKING HAPPENED!!!
there is such a gross feeling of satisfaction when the married guy i used to hook up with likes my facebook status.
Don’t eat the Doritos. Jeff was eating them while he was watching porn
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