a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
The line was so long at Kum n Go some guy opened & drank 2 beers from his 12 pack while waiting.
just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
we ran out of wine so you tried to make some by throwing grapes and nail polish remover in a blender.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just hide your weed in your baby brothers shirt. TSA wont check a baby, thats fucked up
God I love babysitting. They pay me $10 an hour to watch movies and sext
we did rock-paper-scissors to see who would find out if you had alcohol poisoning
She told me I should be a condom model.
He tried to eat me out in the bath... I said it was a bad idea, but he said it was good snorkelling practice for vaca.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up next to her boyfriend and she woke up next to mine....
This is like a fucked up game of musical chairs.
Apparently "I licked it so now it's mine" doesn't apply to people
That awkward moment when the guy you were hitting on at the bar last night is a possible suspect in a murder case.
As a BFF it is your duty to answer when I drunk call you at 3 in the morning because I couldn't find a knife to cut that cake. I finally found one, fell asleep with it and the cake in bed. K thanks bye.
I found my parents stash of sex toys. You know my green one? My mom has it...in purple. I HAVE THE SAME VIBRATOR AS MY MOTHER
Next time I think it’s a good idea to hook up with any of your wife’s family members or friends just kick me in my dick
Randomize