Did Neil Armstrong say the moon was too far away! NO! He built himself a fucking rocketship is what he did!
She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
Hes far too high and trying to explain daylight savings time to me. Help?
Just woke to a Christmas wrapped pack of hotdogs in my bathtub. How high did we get?
you did pass out in the elevator last night, so it could be motion sickness
he built a boat made of joints. holyyy shit
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
I just farted in the bathroom and the guy in the stall next to me started gagging. Its a beauitful day
I was more obsessed with the sweat stain on her back that was simultaneously shaped like a vagina and the virgin Mary.
That's one good thing about being an only child. I can masturbate wherever the fuck I want
If it involves notarization or the Misfits, I am up to date. Anything else, I know fuck-all.
i could have got laid, but instead, i threw up in her hair. you can cross that off the bucket list.
She sent a group text pic called "Assemble" of his dick next to her forearm.
I'm down.
Randomize