we did it on the carpet and she just yells out "OH. MY PSORIASIS".
never trust anyone who drives a pt cruiser.... write that down
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
She bit a glass in half.
Just watched a drug bust from the Ralphs parking lot while listening to Frank Sinatra. Happy Valentine's Day.
At beerfest, hammered, going to try to not get naked in public but i cant make any promises
She is singing the swedish chef song and throwing utensils. I love this place
Bro, I just googled 36 year old pussy so when I do see it I won't be shocked.
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
CALL 911 HAND IS STUCK IN THE GARBAGE DISPOSAL. HELP
Do we still have any pizza left from last night?
He called my boobs fluffy. Part sexy part pilsbury dough boy. Part sexy pilsbury dough boy. I'm so confused. And flattered?
This is the perfect outfit to do ketamine in, I must say
Last night was just a whirlwind of Mario Brothers and sex.
Please don't fuck the professor. We both know that won't end well.
All I fucking want right now is a cheeseburger the size of my face
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