It was kinda weird being the boss
Did you feel like Tony Danza?
i wanted to sleep on a waterbed so i filled up my bathtub so i could fall asleep in it...
No, dude. Even Jesus hates Creed.
Well if I fail my finals for being drunk on Cinco De Mayo there is always next year to graduate.
You said that last year...
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
Um he just came into the kitchen naked to get her purse or something?
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
Gave the kid in the wheelchair at the bus stop a beer and proceede to lift him on the bus. porch drinking brings out the best in everyone
It was a cry at the bar alone type of night, served with a side of passing out facedown in my nachos.
Im the proud new owner of the campus speed bump sign
Oh no. Not her. Her personality clashes with mine in ways that would make me wanna beat myself with a stick.
i woke up with a kayak in my amazon shopping cart with 1 wrong digit on my credit card and the transaction wasn't going through.
Somehow i instagrammed my acceptance letter while blacked out. Then my grandma was the first to comment on it. I got over 50 likes....Phd here I come....
I'm still here... I feel so bad wearing your mom's cardigan at a strip club 🙈
I'm so hungry and so lazy that I'm seriously considering ripping into that packet of cream cheese in my nightstand.
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