I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
halloween is SO much better on drugs, why didn't anyone let us know about this when we were kids
i think the doormans mad at me
well we haven't pretended to pretend we were going to have a threesome with him for a while...
My dream of liquor pitchers came true
you grabbed his arm with one hand and the bottle of smirnoff with the other and headed off to your room you were on a mission
No. No, there is no forgiveness for this. The only way I'm forgiving you for this is if you somehow convince your sister to have sex with me. In her car.
I told him I had AIDS after he bit me. His dad cried. I think I just ruined the little guy's 3rd birthday, but he had in coming.
I just put bacon on a thin mint and enjoyed the shit out of it. I better not be fucking pregnant.
I told him he was a man of science and that he should conduct experiments on my tits to see how they stay up. I need you to hold onto my larynx when I'm drunk.
My logic for bringing him home was, he's in law school so odds are he wouldn't kill me.
I asked for my Beats earbuds back and he sent me a pic of them tied around his penis. Now I miss both my great ear buds and his great dick
Stripper just cleaned my glasses with her nipple...
should i save it for someone special or be a feminist and be like "my vagina doesnt define me"
How was jagerbomb pong?
It was like communism. Great in theory. Terrible when put into practice
You almost lost your european virginity to a Peruvian man waering a do-rag in a port-a-potty.
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