I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
How do people deal with hangovers? I literally want to eat my own face.
Clearly my hormones are sending beaming lights to every penis in the area
I am not even close to finishing violently masturbating over that video.
I WAS JUST SITTING HERE BEING SNIFFED BY ODD WOMEN FOR A SOLID 5 MINUTES. My face was a twist of utter fear and confusion...
A "Tom-vomit" is when you puke but cough as it comes up, so you close you mouth as a natural reaction and the vomit is jet-propelled out your noise.
When you mimic motorboating Jennifer Love Hewitt, is it really that hard to understand why no one thinks you're straight?
My favorite thing about your netflix account "suggestions for you" section: Russias Toughest Prisons is followed immediately by Strange Sex
I can not believe he edited a picture of our three way and made it his profile picture
I just put vodka in my apple sauce. Spice up your fucking life.
We had a moment of silence for all of the orgasms he gave me with his beard before he shaved it off.
*swallows 40 gallons of heavy water and astral projects into buzzfeed* Top Ten Reasons Why I Am God
Don't be upset because I bitch slapped you with intelligence
Moms passed out wet and naked in a rocking chair again....
Randomize
