Just saw a midget shotgun a coors light
On imdb the canadians say It's amazing
rhymes with "ouble enetration"
I love her so much that if I could have sex with her I wouldn't cuz my dick would feel out of place in such a perfect body/vagina
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
Pretty sure a homeless guy just told me to 'lick his balls clean' because I looked at him.
hi sober isdnt real. this is a mass rtoomate taext i thing. bye
AMAZING.
We found you naked curled up in a ball in the closet, using a gorilla suit as a blanket
Called the cops on a high school party then went in after all the kids ran away and took the rest of the beer. What are you doing tonight?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She told me she gets scared easily and that I had to protect her. Then I made a condom joke that ended up making her cry... All bad dude
My mom is selling her car. I'm secretly relieved I won't ever have to tell her about that time you puked in it
1. Why did we have the team Chirstmas party in November 2. Why didn't anyone tell me the coaches were invited 3. Why did coach get the giant vibrator I brought
THERE IS A MOTHERFUCKING HUMMINGBIRD FLYING AROUND IN OUR HOUSE RIGHT NOW HOW DO I GET IT OUT????
In other news, my ex fuck buddy is a surprisingly good wingman.
Dude my roommate just peed out the window
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