party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
I've started bribing my dorm's security guard with cookies so that he doesn't tell all the boys i'm hooking up with about each other.
She started ignoring us once we told her we were out to celebrate your abortion. Who knew strippers could be judgemental?
Please acknowledge the sock on the door. If not it will be rammed up your ass.
This is simple. Just sex and high fives. No feelings.
I was scared I had HIV after last time so I'm not gonna do it again
But he was really hot
Glad you don't have HIV
I just hit on a guy in a doughnut store... is that too suggestive?
I just want to get drunk and wake up on Wednesday
i just called my dad a bottom. he agreed
Turns out the creepy dude who bought us tequila shots was the friend of a friend who then got us a table and several large bottles of champagne.
Never judge a man by his mustache.
I'm giving head in a stairwell, I'll be back in a few minutes. I'm so ashamed.
he sneezed into my face mid-kiss
Bless his heart
He passed out before we could have sex. I had no choice but to use his boner to hold my onion rings.
Randomize
