I would have at least made out with you if you were showered.
Karaoke makes my soul die one wretched song at a time
I'm pretty sure the only race ive ever won was to my mothers egg
Strippers tramp stamp says "mom"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.
She told me I was only the second guy she slept with. I told her she was only my second Megan.
I dont know how to say this. But the hottest girl where im at has one arm.
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
dude you need a shock collar for some of the things you say when you're drunk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't care who it's from we're getting blown. It's a 3 day weekend anything can happen
Just because I don't want to be her booty call doesn't mean I wanna stop getting tit pics. I'm a sucker for double D's
She picked me up from the bar in her underwear.
Omg. I just remembered my underwear is in my wallet
She was on top, but I lost her at "alright, you look like predator."
Yea.. And you'll love me a whole lot more when I start letting my vagina make all the decisions..
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