She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
Freshman orientation day on campus. Dear diary, JACKPOT.
You guessed 7 of 8 bra sizes correctly. You're like a drunk rainman.
I really hope you aren't where I think you are. Dude she has a MUSTACHE. You need Jesus..
I don't even want to talk about it, I'm traumatized. Even the dog knew to take advantage of the most intoxicated girl at the party...
Dude i thought about you literally the second after I came. This friendship is starting to cross some serious boundaries
oh god was she eating orange peels again
She barfed in the corner of the baby pool. Then she yelled "it's okay" repeatedly while trying to scoop it out.
It's not slutty if it's for workout purposes...right?
I'm convinced my penis is the only thing holding this relationship together.
ARTHUR IS ON FUCKING NETFLIX THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
I just did the walk of shame in monkey slippers in the snow
Teach me the song of your people
He is getting no nudes from me. I don't even care if I'm losing his legal advice.
I have a hickey in my new work ID photo.....
He forgot how to sit. we had to pick him up and set him down.
Randomize
