Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
Turns out I'm a social drinker... I just happen to be REALLY social.
I thouht it was time to go to sleep and suddenly I was front row on brokeback mountain
There's a girl n class drinking wine out of a taco bell cup. I can smell it.. it's totally reisling. JEALOUS.
after the first, "yea you like that baby", i quickly remembered why i had stopped having sex with him.
Interestingly im still mad at you for the time we got high and you tried to hump me.
Lol thats a classic
it's too soon in the relationship to think about him when i masturbate. so i think about his dad instead.
I might not remember all of last night but I clearly remember the part where I humped the mailbox.
Hahaha it was a great moment in my life. This must be what post child birth feels like, given you don't get a combined asshole/ vagina
Currently hiding in the shower from the RA and my elbow turns it on. Showers and Ciroc don't mix..
unless you have a dick and you were thinking of chopping that off
i'm not drunk or reckless enough to have you track my every fucking move. I AM AN ADULT
Well if your hearts not big enough, your penis certainly is. Just have a threesome
I'll just bring the big suitcase this trip so I don't have to play wine bottle tetris again.
He had a tattoo of a crown above his penis. He was AMAZING! It was well deserved. LONG LIVE THE KING!
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