I haven't seen Daniella all day...are you sure she was safe going home with that guy?
oh don't worry! i asked him if he was a rapist. he said no
i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
he fingered me, smelled his fingers, then asked me what i ate today..
Dude dan is so baked he taped his remote to the futon so he couldn't lose it again. Come over here
Found out that no one else got Christmas bonuses...and you said nothing good could come from sleeping with my boss.
I was trying to be really smart and save 10 dollars for each cab there and back. ...so I ripped a $20 dollar bill in half.
Learned a valuable life lesson last night. It's titled "Tequila: Still A Bad Idea".
I drove 5 hours to see her. She thanked me by getting shitfaced, inviting her boyfriend over, and making me sleep on the couch after I cooked for them and did the dishes. You're right. I'm a fucking doormat.
$100 bras are my way of telling my boobs that I love and appreciate them, and all the metaphorical doors they have opened for me.
He wants to take me instead of his girlfriend to the happiest place on earth... By that He meant Vegas. My morals are just loose enough to think this is a good idea
Let's get drunk and put things on the grill that have no right to be there.
Happy birthday, America.
Drinking a grey goose and water in a random chair that I found by the road by myself
So there's that.
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
I'm about to eat a honey mustard chicken salad on the toilet while I try to shit. You really think I care about what "kind of guy he is?" The fuck out of here.
If you don't care, I don't. Good luck finding prince charming.
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
Randomize