I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
Passed out on a playground for a while before trying to break into the elementary school. Erica thought her captain tasted like cat food, so she poured her bottle into her cat's dish and proceeded to eat it like cereal.
You win. Erica always eats cat food.
Just took career test that listed librarian and bartender as top career choices. Fascinating.
we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
She's in the middle of blacking out but is singing Mariah carey songs. Hitting every note.
and you wish you could be eating a cookie right now. but all you get to eat is a penis
So I vaguely remember making out with you this morning, I think you were on a date?
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
Sitting in back of morning lecture drinking a daqueri from my pink unicorn cup. Pretty sure the girl next to me smells it.
We grabbed as many adult diapers as we could and made a run for it.
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
How did you get so drunk?
Alcohol.
When we were in Vegas he tried to get an Elvis impersonator to act dead on a toilet so he could take photos. This is even worse
Randomize
