Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
brass monkey on radio. cant stop dancing.
nothing cures the holiday blues like an open bar
the owner gave me a free bottle of vodka and a 12pack of red bull if i agreed to leave. my drunken antics are finally paying off.
Sucks about the cops last night
to be honest when I first looked up I wanted to know who was coming from a costume party..
I am watching the CFL at a Hooters in Texarakana. I made a poor life choice at some point that led me here.
I will not ride trays down a flight of stairs topless and drunk....
they just started filling water ballons with vodka.
on my way.
And we're now at 8 people from the office coming to my desk to ask me "do you feel better?".
Pretty sure I just became my mom's wingman
I can't even express how horny I am. The English language isn't equipped for what I'm plotting.
Tell them to carpool to pride, have a 3way, and if one says 'no thanks' just tell em it's not gay if it happened in a 3way!
I'm shopping for Mother's Day cards while waiting for my herpes medication. What is life.
he accidentally put it in my ass, i liked it but didn't tell him that and "accidentally" took his weed.
he tied his pants around my leg to stop the bleeding... i think he just wanted a good excuse to take his pants off
well did it work?
it was a success in both ways.
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