It's 8:30am and I'm drinking.... this is a new low
I feel dirty and I went home alone. Bars should be like airlines and make fat girls pay double for everything.
I just puked in the walgreens aisle buying gatorade and advil for my hangover... i guess i failed
you kept falling over in mid-conversation and you just got right back up as if nothing happened...
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
I seriously just caught my 15 year old little sister with a positive pregnancy test coming out of the bathroom. Honest to God.
I have a coat hanger and a baseball bat. Her choice.
i just did the math...im a product of my mothers birthday sex
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
Btw, if I didn't have 3 limbs in restraints and my free hand offing myself with the pocket rocket, I would have snap chatted you. Next time.
Seriously I am not buying you condoms anymore. You're 22, if you aren't woman enough to buy them yourself then you don't deserve orgasms. Grow some tits.
Cleaned the whole house at 7:30 and after cleaning the bathroom I think I had cocaine on my sweatpants
THIS IS SO HOT. BYE PANTIES.
so i just realized the reason you didn't answer my call last night is because the remote isn't a phone.
I just want to eat chicken fingers and drink beer and smoke in bed with my laptop so I can watch Netflix
So your not doing THAT great with the break up then...
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