i had a dream that your penis turned into a long neck dinosaur
did it start talking like on Land before time?
I don't know if it was the room or her, but as soon as the pants came off, it smelt like a locker room and old man farts.
i have a wrist watched drawn on my wrist that it says shot o clock
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
Hope you don't mind if I never tell my family about you.
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
I just watched a porn called gay of thrones and I think I've reached a new low in my life
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
99% of the contents of my handbag are ketchup packets and condoms. I feel that says a lot about me as a person.
Mike Pence got the fuck boy eyes though
Why can't he just dump me? This is like a baby seal clubbing the hunter
Did I tell you I’m going on a date? His name is Michael and we both like dinosaurs and anal.
I'm going to blackout. I realize this
Our conversation went from you choking me to my quarter life crisis reeeaaalllll quick.
Randomize