ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
Everything we own is covered in grass and KY
We videoed ourselves having sex... I now know why I close my eyes during sex
spring break forecast: sunny with a chance of shitshow
The doctor told me if I woke up with a broken foot and don't know how it happened, I might want to look into getting treatment.
There's never a time that i stay at this apartment that when i wake up in the morning and sit outside to smoke a cigarette that i don't feel ashamed of myself.
Take off that red sweater and wear my vagina as a facemask.
Done deal I'm dying it right at this moment. I'll need a red Speedo and a half shirt that is extremely tight. Like nipple tight.
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
Drive by water balloon fight on $500,000 boats ended when someone threw a dildo
It was like a square peg in a round hole... I've never seen one shaped like a stick of butter...
Haha I had a heart to heart with a stripper so I would say it was a success?
Okay, so is being determined to have my vagina licked by a woman on Valentine's day an acceptable goal?
never let me tell the bartender to cut me off, i basically told on myself
Who else has a jello penis in their fridge?!
Randomize
