69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
As soon as he told me I had a 'pretty laugh' I knew I'd be putting out more than I had originally planned.
Dude i was hungover i didnt know she was in the shower, she screamed i screamed we all screamed and i just so happend to piss in the shower.
His penis has a special gift of curing my broken heart
He did not want a thank you for helping me move in bj. I don't know how to thank him now.
Pretty sure I humiliated the fuck out of myself last night after I was dared to attempt to give myself head. I hate vodka
Can't a woman sleep on the floor in her own apartment in peace without being judged?
I was wondering why are people staring at me til I realized I was bra-less with a lei around my neck
OK, but next time I'd like to be present for our make-up sex.
how do you politely tell someone their toddler looks alarmingly similar to the berries and cream guy
He was licking my ear while recommending that I shop at IKEA. I think he's my perfect guy.
My vagina just clenched in fear
he was the first penis i touched… i have to go to his shitty bands first gig, i mean come on now
Whose house did we sneak into and play beer pong for 4 hours at last night?
I honestly have no idea
Dude why is my bed and bedding wrapped in bubble wrap?
Cuz u wanted to insure u had a safe sleep
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