Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
you left your dildo in my car
rules of finders keepers apply
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
I just remember thinking, if she falls asleep, I'm totally eating that spilled chex mix right off of her.
So howd u manage to get high at a one year olds birthday anyway?
I just did a Kegel and my back popped. My vagina is a gift to penises everywhere.
I told him that he was essentially a very life-like dildo with a person attached so he needed to stop having feelings because it was getting annoying. He agreed.
styled my pubes into a mustache as a surprise. Thought you should know
I was just doing the math on how much beer we need for the houseboat. in doing so, I came to the conclusion that we need to open a beer distributor business.
he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him
I just coughed and my vagina hurt. We need to hook up more.
I woke up to find a bottle of Bacardi in my shower rack. How was your night?
I pulled you and a keg around in a wagon for like five hours and apparently everyone else remembers it but us.
Yeah bc that's when u should take a Molly. At a house party with everyone from ur hometown
And to celebrate the raising of our lord I just purchased a bunny buttplug. Am I doing this Easter thing right?
Randomize
