i met a boy and i'm in lovvvvveeeeeeee and we're going to vegas and getting marrrrrriiiieeeeedddddd!
let's be honest with each other here, that's about the worst idea you've ever had. you need to walk this one off.
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
i think i recognize dicks better than faces
We totally just fucked in a closet. These vacations with his family are causing creativity I never thought I had.
Dude with the Beatles haircut just got his pilots license and wants to take us up to do a case race mid flight. Don't tell me networking is unnecessary.
well.. I tried flushing my sandals down the toilet
Alright. I will breast feed the first person to get here.
Why can't public transit accommodate my lifestyle of drinking til midnight on a Monday?
looking at my texts from you makes me want to throw up in my pants
I wish drunk me wasn't so into manscaping. Or at least good at it. Either or really
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
Want to do me the honour of waxing my legs again before I go to Mexico? I feel like it's a tradition we shouldn't break.
I'm sorry I told you to go fuck yourself after you said good morning to me when I was hungover.
You leaned over to me in the elevator and whispered "how long do I have to pretend to be sober?"
Or is it distressingly heterosexual?
Randomize
