A girl just told me I should smile because I was surrounded by hot girls. I told her that clearly beauty was in the eye of the beholder. And she slapped me!
I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
Its like im going on a blind date, but ive already had sex with her
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so when i dont talk to her she talks to herself...idk whats worse
Let's just say that watching the sunrise in a space helmet is really the only way to do it.
Oh they knew you from a bachelorette party! You were the pole?
Ohhh shit yeah that was me. Fuck. I hate myself when I do that.
Yeah, he has a kid now! Shit... You know you're all grown up when the people you used to have threesomes with become parents
Anything you tell me within three minutes of an orgasm isn't even being recorded in my head.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I cartwheeled across every street... They tried to stop me but I bit anyone who came near me
You were on shrooms and "the trees are crazy green!" is all you could manage.
Copy that. Decided to shower with a beer in a glass bottle. Gotta stop the bleeding first. Be there is 20
I feel like my stoner spirit animal is Janice from the muppets.
Dude she literally licked him. He was covered in cheese and in her high state what else was she gonna do?
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
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