His uber religious wife caught us having anal sex in their bed..... she called us sodomites. Can you even be a sodomite if you're a girl?
You're not a sodomite. You're a whore. Tell her to get the insults right. Did she try to save you with Jesus?
She said she'd pray for me. Man, if I had just caught my husband balls deep in some ho, I'd say fuck the praying and kick her ass.
its like my vagina has this homing beacon out to all the guys saying "come find me, i havent been shaved in weeks"
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
FACT: the parking lot attendant was yelling "NO SEX HERE! NO SEX" at yall.
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
he was definitely TRYING to give me herpes.
What can I say? I like my food like I like my women, not entirely fucked by our contemporary world.
I woke up with hair in my teeth and half his beard was missing.
Dude it was bad... like you fell asleep around the toilet after drinking from the back tank bad.
I heard you coughing. Are you choking or smoking? And are you okay?
Some toppless girl just walked past me in the hall and gave me half a carton of smokes. I have never been more aroused.
My boss followed me on Twitter. Excuse me while I delete 90% of my tweets
for the record im never blowing a guy on the toilet again, that was sad and degrading
She can be as judgemental as she wants. But she thinks the female orgasm is a myth so who is really winning here...
thats all i want out of life, to get high and watch weiner dog races
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