Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
You threw up in a Dixie cup last night. Oddly, you just gained major points in my book for that.
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
Why do I feel like the only way for this trip to end is alcohol poisoning?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I told him if I was pregnant we were coming out to the people at work, because I'm not pretending to get knocked up by an imaginary boyfriend.
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
Highlight of the night: paying my cell phone bill at the bar... I need to get laid.
This is why I need to move out...so my naked vomit covered walk of shames to the bathroom are only witnessed by one other person who is equally as pathetic as me and the cat
Remember that time you came over to my house and I was on the porch naked and eating peanut butter?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've now spilled wine and got poptarts all over my cast. So much for my doc taking me seriously...
There was a comma in between her and dick. I was calling you a dick. Jesus.
are you listening to the theme from Jurassic Park whilst pooping?
Is it okay to mention my ambition to become a supervillian and kill all humans on a first date, or is that a second date discussion?
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
We hooked up and he sent me home with a plant and skittles lmao
Randomize