just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
I'll trade you a raw potato for some vodka
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
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We just licked a sour creme and onion chip for salt for a tequila shot. Our vacation has officially begun.
all I heard when I woke up this morning was "BONG HITS FOR BREAKFAST" being yelled repeatedly.
Something strange is happening to me, I think I miss hooking up with girls sober
She wasnt impressed wen i brought a guy for her back with me, a 3am impromptu sperm donor is not a gd birthday present. Im a bad gf.
He fucked me so hard I might have to go to the hospital for internal bleeding
Can I have him when you're done?
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Turns out the dorm toilet can't take a punch. Gonna be a long year without Mexican food.
Is it weird to wish your favorite hooker "happy thanksgiving"?
We drank vodka and koolaid through a traffic cone. It got rowdy.
I made him cum so hard he couldn't play video games for like an hour. I've never been more proud of myself.
Did we actually play with swords last night or did I dream that?
I don't care. We're going to fuck. And I WONT apologize in the morning. You cheated on me, so you can cheat on her with me.
Randomize