I just saw a woman parallel park a horse. Awesome. Only in New York..
I forgot i ate a salad for dinner, so while i was barfing in his toilet, i kept screaming "i ate leaves?? i cant believe you let me eat leaves!"
My number went up to seventeen today. I forgot to add my random hookup on a sailboat.
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
I think it was you who decided that coming home at 3AM and cooking eggs topless was the best way to end our night. Eating the scrambled eggs off each other's boobs, that was ellie's idea
The fact that he is from Canada is way more embarrassing than the fact that you met him on match.com
She poured a bottle of rum in the champagne fountain, did like 5 jello shots at the same time, then lit herself on fire. Twice. This is how everyone should turn 21.
I five year old is judging me because I just opened a bottle of Sam Adams with my teeth before 8am
It was a group decision to take your pants off. Took a solid 10 minutes. No more skinny jeans while drinking.
I think they took out their livers years ago and replaced them with like cheese graters or something. Only explanation.
So if a girl goes for it you're gonna stop her and tell her you gave up ejaculation for lent?
22 is way too old to still be having "thank god I think I'm getting my period" days
You know you're too high when you find yourself crying at " hand in my pocket" by Alanis Morissette because it's "just TOO REAL"
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
He got punched in the face last night? By who? I’ll invite him to our formal. Seriously.
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