she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
the pizza man had no reaction when jackie and me opened the door naked, i guess he's used to that shit
You came in at two thirty, wearing your underwear and a tie then asked where you could find a sombrero and a pair of stilletos that would fit your men's size thirteen feet.
Nope. Can't afford girlfriends. Still looking for the 25 year old bisexual tripled who owns a brewery or a casino.. the search continues....
My halloween constume SCREAMS "Hey i just got done with a shitty relationship and I'm DTF"
i think he spiked my sandwich with a viagra
That's not a funny feeling. That's hepatitis. You got it from that bar where everything was sticky.
Again? Most people check out of hotels, they don't escape from them
It's like she fell out of an MTV reality show and no one knows how to send her back
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
And to celebrate the raising of our lord I just purchased a bunny buttplug. Am I doing this Easter thing right?
We've been taking shots, cranking Marilyn Manson, and eating your bacon. Your kid is probably ruined.
None of what you just said was coherent
I just bought wine at a gas station what the hell do you expect
It feels weird going to sleep without hugging the toilet goodnight
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