So she couldn't stop dragging her teeth while she was blowing me.
Ahh dude, that fucking sucks, what'd you do about it?
Decided to drag my teeth while eating her out... She got the point.
I plan on putting pajamas back on after I shower. Today is going to be awesome.
It would be worth it to see how drunk he is right now.
He cartwheeled into the side of the neighbor's garage.
Ok, i'm coming over
you need to do more things constructive for your career. like wearing pants more often.
The last thing I remember is him grabbing my ass and telling me he knew where the jello shots were, so I followed him.
i refuse to be around anyone not wearing a sombrero...its cinco de mayo
This weekend i learned three things 1) skittles in vodka is good 2) it takes more than a roll of quarters to get a cab home 3) never tell a bartender to give you your change in actual change
Just went over my top ten highlight reel with that guy I'm fucking. It was like we were sports announcers. But about sex.
How the hell could he be confused. He had a naked girl running to him. I feel like he would enjoy that.
He took some pill and now he's on all fours demanding we give him chips from the dog bowl. Come get him.
He literally had a Trump sign in his front yard. I just can't now.
She's currently singing "I'm gonna keep on lovin you" to her pillow. How do you think tonight went?
You could cut the tension with my nipples.
Just remembered someone sprayed perfume in my mouth last night after convincing me it was vodka and that i tried to herd ducks around campus and bring one home.
I’ve got a closet full of cosplay outfits and horny boytoy to help me ride out this pandemic
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