If I see one more duchette wearing Ed Hardy, but not actually having a real tattoo. I swear Im gonna shank a bitch.
I need to find out who his wife is so I can fuck her before he gets to mine.
Printing the vagina inspector badge was money well spent.
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
Amazing. Super drunk. We stole a street sign in a golf cart and went around jousting trash cans all night.
Tim john just told us the story about him losing his virginity at 14 during church on the emergency exit staircase. This is day drinking?
Update. He just picked me up and tried to demonstrate
I will cut you
Oddly enough thats the second time today someones said that to me
Put that in perspective
I should start printing out disclaimer handouts and passing them out to people saying, "I can not be held responsible for anything I say or do this evening."
She refuses to believe she pulled down her pants and spanked her ass in front of us
Hey, if I can't get it and you're still alive, can you get the glass out of my foot? Happy Sunday.
So I just bought e from my sophomore home ec teacher. How's your weekend going?
I hurt myself, but I'm pretty sure I saved the carpet.
Gay?
German.
Pity.
Remember the time you puked your contact lens out?
She was cleaning herself at the bus stop. She also picked up gum off the ground and ate it
Randomize
