I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
Tomorrow will not be complet unless someone eats me out. Just sayin
throwing up turkey will be a nice break from throwing up ramen
I hope to God 2011 is the year I stop loving tequila.
You got her pregnant one week before your vasectomy? You couldn't wait one week to cheat on me?
She shit all over my seat. She is not allowed in my car under any circumstances. Not even with drugs. You can't forgive a shit.
I'm taking a dab in mourning of how long its been since I smoked with you guys.
Not remembering where I left my grinder before vacation #stonerproblems
He came on my favorite pants. He is dead to me.
Oh, now I remember why I deleted your number. You're kind of a dick. Please delete mine.
Girl just left one of the apts upstairs carrying a giant bottle of kahlula and a lunchable.... I feel like we could be friends
Just saw you run by my class yelling "fuck you!". Good luck and stay human!
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
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